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But while the impulse to protect or shield our children can seem normal or wise, the wisdom of Scripture suggests an alternative to our conventional assumptions.

Here are three positive reasons you should take your children to funerals.

1. To Help Children Understand That Death Is Part of Life

Our children experience death all around them. Unfortunately, it’s often either glamorized through a round-winning “head shot” in Call of Duty or desensitized by the sheer volume of death in the latest Marvel film. Ironically, the more our kids encounter death in pop culture, the more abstract, surreal, and distant it can seem to them.

Meanwhile, the rest of society seems bent on sanitizing or erasing the specter of death. Note the subtle changes, for example, in our vocabulary. “Graveyards” became “cemeteries,” and now we have “memorial parks.” “Funerals” became “memorial services,” and now we have “celebrations of life.” Cemeteries used to be common fixtures in churchyards, reminders for Sunday parishioners that death will come to us all. But most newer cemeteries are hidden away from view, unseen in the day-to-day rhythms of most people’s lives. And consider our cultural obsession with youth, fitness, vitality and anything eaten, oiled, or applied to keep death and decay at bay. Our children aren’t being helped to understand that death is a real evil in this world—an evil that forces everyone to consider how to steward their lives (Ecc. 9:1–12). Funerals help our children recognize the full weight and gravity of mortality.

2. To Model Grief for Our Children

We know how to have fun with our children, but do we know how to weep with them? If we only expose them to life’s joys, but not its trials, are we truly preparing them for a world that groans under the burden of sin (Rom. 8:20)? In the face of death, the cultural extremes of avoidance and stoicism on one hand or emotional collapse and unrestrained grief on the other won’t give our children the full range of God-given emotions that will help them process life and its difficult events.

Our children need to feel loss, to process it honestly, to see us moved by grief, and to watch as we lean upon God, even in his dark providence. As we process the loss together, age-appropriate conversations about his goodness, sovereignty, and the problem of suffering can be broached in a way that strengthens their faith and prepares them for a world where these three doctrines constantly intersect. Funerals help our children learn how to grieve in the face of death and to hope in the light of Christ (John 11:25).

3. To Help Our Children See the Gospel in Darkness

The gospel of Jesus Christ never shines brighter than in life’s darkest moments. No life event makes this clearer than a funeral. I never had to say anything to my children about the importance of the gospel when I took them to funerals, because they could see and hear it for themselves. They could see the overwhelming grief of those who didn’t know Christ—contrasted with the grace, hope, and resolve of those who did. They could hear sobs of despair contrasted with voices of hope.

True, my children may not have been able to articulate these differences when they were younger, but it was clear from their wide-eyed expressions and curious glances that the differences registered at a more foundational level. The effect of such an experiences creates fertile soil for the seeds of gospel conversations to sprout—about life, death, eternity, and why we make much of Jesus and the salvation he offers. Unlike almost any other life event, funerals help our children understand the power and necessity of the gospel.

Yes, funerals can be difficult. They are visceral and tragic reminders of sin’s earthly consequences. But that doesn’t mean God can’t use them to cultivate wisdom and hope in our kids (Ecc. 7:1–4). As parents, we hope their lives are marked by God’s goodness and favor rather than life’s darker realities. But in a fallen world we should seek every opportunity—even funerals—to disciple them and grow their confidence in the certain hope of Christ.

But the Christmas blues came early this year.  On the first Sunday of advent we planned a free evening Christmas concert—with Melanie Penn and her band.  We even had free Norwegian Waffles (my great grandmother’s recipe) and free Mexican hot chocolate.  I printed and posted flyers in the neighborhood. I took out Facebook ads for our area. I’ve been talking about it to our church and our community, trying to get them excited for our season of Advent.

Then… the Wednesday before the concert, my back seizes up like a ball of rubber bands. Herniated disc.  The Thursday before the concert a pipe cracks in our kitchen and we have to call our insurance (our kitchen is still non-functioning). Sunday first service was lightly attended. Our second service was lighter. (This is especially uncharacteristic because it is communion Sunday and normally almost everyone shows up.) I figured the concert would be packed because so many had missed church, but it wasn’t. We might have had 60 people (and I was hoping for about 140).  

I was discouraged.  I was frustrated. I was mad.  I just wanted to crawl under the covers and hibernate for about a month.  The Christmas Blues had overshadowed me and it was only December 2.

You may be one of those rare pastors who seldom gets discouraged, whose church is always bursting at the seams, and whose optimism vanquishes any hints of depression. God bless you brother! I suspect however that there are some others of my “ilk” out there.  Let me tell you how the Lord helped me beat the blues. 

I was going to skip prayer meeting today.  I have an excuse. It is raining in Southern California and my back is still bothering me.  In fact when I walked into the prayer meeting someone told me they hoped I would have stayed home and rested. That same person normally prepares a Scripture for us to ponder as we open the meeting, but they hadn’t and I hadn’t, but I told them I had something. Psalm 30 came to mind (and I think it was the Holy Spirit that impressed it upon me— that’s what I’m going with).

I’ll be completely honest with you, I didn’t remember what was in Psalm 30, but I turned there and began reading.

Psa. 30:1  I will exalt you, O LORD,

                for you lifted me out of the depths

                and did not let my enemies gloat over me.

Psa. 30:2   O LORD my God, I called to you for help

                and you healed me.

Psa. 30:3   O LORD, you brought me up from the grave;

                you spared me from going down into the pit.

Psa. 30:4  Sing to the LORD, you saints of his;

                praise his holy name.

Psa. 30:5   For his anger lasts only a moment,

                but his favor lasts a lifetime;

        weeping may remain for a night,

                but rejoicing comes in the morning.

Fight the Christmas blues…

• By praying (Calling out to the Lord).

Jesus doesn’t have voicemail.  A man – the God man is at the right hand of God interceding for us. He hears us and has the power to act on our behalf.

• By reflecting on God’s deliverance (you brought me up from the pit).

Brother, look back on your life and remember his faithfulness over and over again in individual circumstance and remember his faithfulness in raising you up with Christ (Ephesians 2:6). Christ is risen and you have been raised with Him.

By singing ( Sing to the LORD, you saints of his). When David played his harp, demons fled from Saul. Keith Getty tells me that if you combine the words sing, exalt, extol, and its other synonyms, it’s the most frequent command in the Bible.

By remembering His promise (weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning). Joy is coming, of this we can be certain.  He always keeps His promises.

Acts29 OC is hosting a FREE Training Event with Peter Jones on Thursday, October 8th. The event will be called, “The Truth & The Lie About Gender & Sexuality.”

Timeline:

• 3:00pm Pastors Training
• 5:00pm Pastors Dinner & Q&A
• 7:00pm Church-Wide Training

Location:

Village Church of Irvine
77 Post
Irvine, CA

The Pastors Training will focus on issues related to sexuality, its impact on pastors, our leaders, and the church. Peter will address our response to current cultural shifts, etc. We’ll serve afternoon coffee, etc. We’ll meet in our HUB.

The Pastors Dinner & Q&A will be a catered dinner with Peter. During this time we’ll have more time for lengthly Q&A, and time to interact with Peter personally and collectively on related topics. HUB again.

The Church-Wide Training will take similar material we engage in the Pastors Training and apply it to our congregants and our churches at large. Peter will reinforce things you’ve likely been affirming, and encourage your people in some deeper ways as well. For this part, we’ll gather in our sanctuary. (77 Post, Irvine)

We hope to see you there!

And as much as I try to care for these women, I am constantly made aware that I am not enough. In the face of all the needs I crumble. I revert to the belief that my justification is somehow contingent upon my performance and influence in the lives of those around me. The guilt heaps on me like a ton of bricks.

But my response to these problems is sin. It is a direct result of not meditating on the gospel every single day. I need to be reminded that true and lasting hope rests in a Person and that person is not me. Jesus made this glaringly obvious: “…I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6).

This is the most freeing news my soul could hear and I need this reminder daily. Without it I find my heart is prone to revert back to my old ways. Rather than bringing others to the burden-lifter I try to usurp the role of God and carry the burden myself. This not only damages me but it also damages the church as a result.

Unfortunately, when I speak with other women who serve in ministry, I find that my struggles are not unique. The weight is very real and the needs are very great.

A few months ago my husband and I were talking about this common theme among ministry leaders. After spending a lot of time with women involved in ministry within our own church and among other churches throughout Orange County we recognize that this struggle is unfortunately all too common.

My husband has had the blessing of witnessing the fruit that comes from the TG4OC gatherings among the pastors in Orange County. I’ve always had the thought in the back of my mind that I would love to see something similar for pastors’ wives and ministry leaders.

Through a lot of thoughtful conversation and prayer my husband and I decided to explore that idea a bit more. We are very excited to announce that we will be hosting our first pastors’ wives and ministry leaders event this January.

The speaker for our first event will be Elyse Fitzpatrick. Elyse has written several books including, Because He Loves Me, Comforts From the Cross, and, most recently, Good News for Weary Women: Escaping the Bondage of To-Do Lists, Steps, and Bad Advice. Elyse has a huge heart for speaking into the weariness epidemic that has invaded our church communities and is committed to encouraging women everywhere to live a gospel-centered life.

I think we are in for a real treat! We hope you all can make it. Please go here for more details.

I don’t buy it.

Small can have impact. "A little yeast works through the whole batch of dough.”
“A little light lights up the whole house.” Yes, Jesus preached to big crowds, but he went deep with twelve men.

People left Jesus all the time. Remember Jesus declaring in John Chapter 6 that he was the bread of life, then going on to say,

Jesus said to them, “I tell you the truth, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day. For my flesh is real food and my blood is real drink. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in him. Just as the living Father sent me and I live because of the Father, so the one who feeds on me will live because of me. This is the bread that came down from heaven. Your forefathers ate manna and died, but he who feeds on this bread will live forever.”

Shortly after this announcement, disciples start leaving in droves because his words were hard. Thousands had been coming; the numbers dwindled to a few. I don’t mean to say that people leaving is a mark of great spirituality, but I’m not sure we can say that people coming is clear sign of faithfulness.

I’ve served as senior pastor of Trabuco Canyon Community Church (TCCC) for 12 years, the first 9 years bi-vocationally, the last 3 years in a full-time capacity. TCCC has a unique distinction of being about 3 miles away from the mega-church known to all as Saddleback. The building that we meet in was built in the 1960s to look like the kind of church you’d find in Walnut Grove (Imagine Little House on the Prairie). We’ve got stained glass windows, pews, hymnals, a bell from a SantaFe Railroad steam engine, and a little kitchen off the fellowship hall. The fire marshal says we can seat 150, but we normally only hit that mark at weddings and funerals. In fact if we get 150 between both services that’s a REALLY good Sunday … and I’m okay with that.

I’ve met Rick Warren, the pastor of Saddleback Church, once, and he’s a nice guy … at least he was nice to me. I’ve never heard a word of heresy out of his mouth. I’ve joked that I “oversee his ministry” because our building is located at a higher elevation than his campus, and we can “look down” into a portion of his parking lot, but I don’t know Rick Warren. This article isn’t intended to bash big churches, but they are not for everyone. The reality is that the median church (non-orthodox/ non-Catholic) in the U.S. has 75 regular participants in worship on Sunday mornings, according to the National Congregations Study. http://www.soc.duke.edu/natcong/

I do know people who have attended Saddleback and who are now at TCCC. Some held official leadership positions there, others led small groups, and some just went to services on Sunday.

Those who stick around at TCCC like that their pastor knows their name. They like being able to talk to him and pray with him. They like that he teaches the youth group (which he may be getting to old to do soon). They are thankful that he has the time to sit with them in the hospital.

According to 9 Marks, 1,700 pastors quit the ministry every month. I’ve thought about quitting at times. In our consumer-driven society, we all want to be “winners.” The pastors who are held up as role models minister at the biggest and best churches, write the most popular books, broadcast to millions, shape culture and make a difference. Being the shepherd of a little “country church” that is hard to find…well let’s just say it doesn’t appeal to my ego. But ministry in the Kingdom isn’t about my ego or yours; it’s about God’s glory.

If you are a pastor ,let me remind you that you are not Rick Warren and neither am I.

So how do we stay focused on the work God has called us to?

These are some of the things that are helping me, and I hope they will be of service to you.

1. Don’t isolate yourself. There is a reason the disciples were sent out two by two. I’m the only pastor at TCCC. We’re not part of a denomination. There have been times as a pastor when I’ve felt very much alone. Find other pastors. Share fellowship with them. Meet and pray with them. I’ve been blessed to gather with several other pastors from different churches each Thursday morning for encouragement in God’s word.
2. Trust in God’s calling. You are uniquely called and uniquely gifted to serve where God has called you. I can’t remember who shared these words of wisdom with me but I’ve taken them to heart: “don’t despise your own calling or covet the calling of another.” I know we like to measure success in big numbers and big budgets … but God often delights in using the small so that His glory might be magnified. Think about Bethlehem. Think about Gideon.
3. Jesus is the Chief Shepherd. It’s not your church—it’s His. I remember the first family who told me they were leaving the church. I was devastated. They wanted a bigger youth group for their kids. I just wished they would have held out a bit longer. When the worship leader leaves and you wonder if the church will last, remember Christ said He will build His church.
4. Fast and pray. Pray for your leaders, your family, and your whole congregation by name if you can. Print up a church directory and pray though it. Invite your congregation pray though it. As Luther said “Pray and let God worry.”
5. Focus on God’s purposes not your vanity. I remember hearing Mark Dever sharing how John Brown, in a letter of paternal counsel to one of his pupils newly ordained over a small congregation, wrote:

“I know the vanity of your heart, and that you will feel mortified that your congregation is very small, in comparison with those of your brethren around you; but assure yourself on the word of an old man, that when you come to give an account of them to the Lord Christ, at his judgment-seat, you will think you have had enough.”

6. Love. It’s hard. People are messy. You might find greater comfort in your books, but ministry is about caring for souls.
7. Build altars. You don’t need to pile stones, but maybe create a bookmark for your Bible where you write down those times in which God showed up in a big way. The year you met budget and you didn’t think you would. The time when those three families left at the same time because they were mad about a church discipline issue and you couldn’t share the details, but you were hoping and praying that those under discipline would be restored to fellowship.
8. Extend grace and receive grace. We are all works in progress. We are all still being sanctified. Christ’s atoning work is complete, but the sanctifying work of the Spirit is ongoing (certain, but ongoing).
9. Don’t neglect the Gospel. The Gospel isn’t just the gateway to the Christian life, it is what will sustain you in the Christian life. Preach it, share it, be transformed by it.
10. Trust the preaching of God’s word. Enjoy the rhythm of preaching each week. You toil in the vineyard of the Lord. That is good work regardless of the size of the plot of land you have been given. Cast the seed and pray for the harvest. Point the congregation to their only hope – Jesus.

I gave this article the title How to Minister Well at a Small Church. I don’t claim to be an expert. I know for certain these ten things have been of great help and blessing to me, even though I still struggle with them. I am trying to minister well, and I hope that you may add a remark in the comments below that has helped keep you grounded.

 ___

Robert Jacobsen serves as senior pastor at Trabuco Canyon Community Church

The first thing you probably noticed when you got here is that the branding is more closely integrated with The Gospel Coalition's. If you're familiar with our story, then you already know that The Gospel for OC began as a blog, but matured into a network of churches, and eventually launched TGC's Orange County regional chapter. Our new website and branding is intended to reflect this identity as an official TGC regional chapter. We've partnered with Church Plant Media, a web design firm that designed many of TGC's regional websites. They do fantastic work, and we are pleased with how it turned out.

Here are a few of the website's features to check out:

• Events – This includes a list of local events hosted by our regional chapter or its associated churches. For example, you can learn more about the O.C. Orphan Care Summit or find out when our next pastors' luncheon is.
• Resources – Here you'll find a list of local resources, along with TGC resources that might serve your church well.
• Blog – This will be where we post regular news and updates on The Gospel for OC. We will also post various articles and stories relating to theology, ministry, and mission in Orange County.
• Media – Download or stream messages about gospel-centered life and ministry. For example, check out the foundational messages from Tim Keller and D.A. Carson, or check back for messages by local OC pastors.
• Churches – Find a church that belongs to our network.

More information is forthcoming. 

Since launching this site was a team effort, I would like to thank: 

• Jon Maxim at Church Plant Media for his tireless effort in getting this website off the ground. Jon, Tanner, and the rest of the CPM team provided timely and excellent support during our building stages. 
• Cameron Morgan for his offering his masterful help and consultation in all things related to design and graphics.
• Blue Letter Bible for providing the time and staffing needs to help get this labor finished.

We hope and pray that this site serves you well as we strive to promote gospel-centered ministry for the next generation.

I wanted to let you know about an upcoming Orphan Care Summit that Faith Bible Church will be hosting next weekend. We are holding the Summit on Saturday, Nov. 1st, the same weekend as International Orphan Sunday. In the past, we have held a number of Orphan Care events at FBC, but generally aimed at our body. This year we would like to branch out and make this event accessible to believers all over Orange County.

The Orphan Issue Is a Gopsel Issue

Our main purpose in this 1 day conference to is advance the cause of orphan care as a fruit of the gospel. Thus our theme for this year is 'The Call of the Cross'. Our guest speaker will be Dr. Mark Tatlock, an adoptive father and president of The Master's Academy International. We will have a mixture of plenary and break out sessions with a few different tracks: orphan care ministry in the church, adoption, foster care, and other orphan care-related issues. Our desire is both to encourage and equip believers to either carry on the work of orphan care or to find out how they can become involved. We will have a number of guest ministries on hand who provide various opportunities and services related to orphan care (child sponsorship, adoption, foster care placement, etc.).

The Schedule

The Summit itself will go from approximately 8:00 AM until 4:00 PM (a schedule with breakout sessions will be coming soon). In the evening, following a dinner break, FBC will be having its annual Orphan Care Night. This is an evening session that is open to everyone, free of charge, and will include more information and testimonies about Orphan Care, as well as a silent auction to raise money for Orphan Care at FBC. This evening session is a more informal time, providing both valuable information as well as a time of fellowship. On Sunday morning, FBC will also be celebrating International Orphan Sunday and Dr. Tatlock will be preaching. Everyone is invited to come and worship with us if they are still in the area.

The Church's Call of the Cross

We are convinced that orphan care is a fruit of the gospel working in the lives of God's people. We are also convinced that the church needs to be involved in this unique area of ministry. If the church is going to be involved, it is vitally important that pastors, elders, and other church leaders are truly supportive and fully behind this kind of gospel ministry. In light of that, we are offering any attendees of the conference the opportunity to bring their pastor for free! We will have a break out session just for pastors, as well as an informal pastors' lunch with Dr. Tatlock.

Conference Details

It is our desire that the Summit would be accessible to all, so the cost is only $25/person, which includes lunch. There will not be childcare available, though. We will be meeting at Stoneybrooke Christian School in Ladera Ranch. (26122 O'Neill Drive, Ladera Ranch, CA 92694). Registration will open on Friday, October 10th on our website: www.faithbibleoc.org.

While we know that November is quickly approaching, we hope that you will be able to tell people you know about the Summit: your churches, friends, family...and anyone interested in learning more about orphan care!

If anyone has questions about the Summit, they can contact me via email or by calling (949) 326-3056.

Hoping to see you November 1st!

Many have sought to write off the fear in this passage by calling it “reverence” for God, and by calling reverence for God “respect.” If that’s the case though, why tremble? I have never seen a person tremble out of respect, but I have seen many tremble out of fear.

On the other hand, many have claimed that this passage shows that our continued obedience is on our own shoulders, focusing on the “your own” from “work our your own salvation.” But it doesn’t say, “work for,” it says, “work out.” I believe this view can also be refuted by answering the question: why tremble?

So, why does Paul say we tremble? We are blessed in this passage by one little word that makes a world of difference: “for.” Work out your own salvation. How? With fear and trembling.

And now, for our central question, why? “For it is God who works in you.”

To what end? “Both to will and to work for His good pleasure.”

On the one hand, a simple respect makes no sense of the trembling. On the other hand, if we’re trembling because we might not live up to the task of keeping our salvation, verse 13 makes no sense.

What makes a Christian tremble? Is it future punishment? No, there is none for the Christian. Is it the weight of their own goodness? No. Only God is good (Mark 10:18). As my friend Chris has stated in the subtext to his recent book, the Christian trembles before God alone. I like this subtext, and I think it is perfectly in line with Philippians 2:12-13. That little word “for” agrees with me and Chris too. Why tremble? Because this work that I do is not wrought by me. As I work hard to obey God, I recognize that this is the work of Almighty God! This means that I do not tremble because God might damn me. What Paul gives me here speaks only to my salvation. I tremble as I work out my salvation, because I know that anything I do to please God is itself an encounter with a Holy, perfect, awesome, fearsome God. He is acting upon my life to bring about a heart that wants to do His will, and He is acting upon my life to bring about acts that reflect will. The one who created the whole earth with a few words. The one who has thunder and lightning coming from His throne. The one who commands the seas, laughs at the rage of the heathen nations, and conquers death with joy. He is acting upon my life, bringing about the fruit of my salvation. This is why I tremble.

The ultimate book—the source of ultimate truth—is the Bible

What is theology? The study of God.

What is the best way to study God? Is it to read a book about the Bible or the Bible itself?

Think about it.

While knowledge is important, God isn’t interested in just knowledge. He wants a knowledge that will transform your life. He wants you to read the Bible and put yourself under it. We can read what people write about God or we can read what God says about Himself.

I am not saying reading theological books is bad. I am saying that we must remember our priorities—God’s Word is our supreme source of our theology. Dwight Moody said, “The Bible was not given to increase our knowledge but to change our lives.” As we increase our knowledge of God we better understand Him and fear Him, leading to wisdom and sanctification (Proverbs 9:10). If we do not know God then we cannot understand Him nor fear Him, let alone obey Him.

Let’s go to Paul in his second letter to Timothy, where gave his friend an encouragement to stay with the Scriptures: “…the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work” (2 Timothy 3:16-17). In the context of this verse the Apostle is referring specifically to the Old Testament writings, but we can apply it to the New Testament as well and consequently the entire Bible. There is a lot of richness in this short statement, but here are two lessons we can learn from Paul’s charge to Timothy.

1. Renewing your mind

Paul writes that the Bible is useful for teaching and reproof. We need to be equipped. We need to be complete. We need to be renewing our minds daily, and the way to do that is by reading God’s Word and allowing the Spirit to illuminate it for us. (Romans 12:2) We have been given the Spirit of God, a gift of grace, who gives us understanding and illumination of the things of God (1 Corinthians 2:12-14). Let us come to the Word in humility and diligence, knowing that it is a privilege to be able to have this gift of understanding instead of taking it for granted. Also, we should allow it to correct us rather than attempting to make the Bible act as a proof text for our own thoughts.

2. Knowing God’s way through the Word

The Apostle Paul writes about how Scripture is ‘breathed out by God’, meaning that what is written are the very words of God. The word of God brings knowledge and understanding (Proverbs 2:6). In Psalm 119, it is clear that the psalmist is hungry for God’s word. He constantly dwells on it. We are to saturate our hearts with the Bible. We should have a desire to know God because He reveals Himself to us in His word, which is truth (John 17:17). By studying God’s Word we may be trained in righteousness, knowing what God has revealed about His character, His will, and His commands.

Who should we look to?

Jesus sets a wonderful example when He woke up early in the morning to talk to His Father. (Mark 1:35) Setting a devoted time of the day to read your Bible is helpful. Pray that the Lord will give you a diligent, devoted, and active spirit in reading the Word. Pray that He will take away idleness and strive to have self-discipline with your time. In all this social networking, television, and technology, it’s so easy to be distracted. So consider getting off Facebook to get your face into the Book. My encouragement is that you be refreshed daily by beginning and ending your day with the Lord.